Blah, Blah, Blah

a wish for your day

Hi Readers,

Wednesdays can be so blah.  It’s not the dreaded start of the week nor is it the exciting conclusion but somewhere in between, lost in the middle, standing off by its lonesome.  It can get you down.  It can be so dreary but what is the saying?  See the glass half full or half empty?

At the end of every storm, there is sunshine and calm, peace.  Whatever you’re going through at the time is temporary and things will get better.  Don’t ever forget that.   There are plenty of people who love you and are rooting for you every day though you may not be aware of them or not realizing it.  You are loved and you will get through this!

Check out my brand new Positivity page for more inspiration.

https://www.facebook.com/Positivity-Pause-with-Michael-854566458079147/

 

~*~*  Have a wonderful Wednesday, my friends!  ~*~*

 

 

A break for Positivity, please

Take a break from the hustle and bustle and stresses of the day for a bit of Positivity.

Michael and I welcome you.

Article for today concerns my hair needs.  =0)

I will also be hosting promotions and giveaways plus announcing my books later on, for a bit of entertainment and fun.  Join the celebration for the Grand Opening of my Page.  Come interact with me and leave your cares behind.  All are welcome!

https://www.facebook.com/PositivityPause

I choose joy

 

 

 

A Daydream of Paradise

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Sometimes, when we are striving to reach our goals, we forget how very much we have in our lives. We start taking them for granted, feeling we don’t have enough because we want so much more. As an author, we might even compare ourselves with others, colleagues who have hit the big leagues, have titles we covet like “best-selling author”, a book that is a best seller or a book that is in the top 100’s when ours are teetering in the millions.

I want so much more in life and even more with my book business but it seems the struggle continues. I try and try but success seems so far away and I wonder if I will ever obtain it. The more I try, the more success seems to be out of my grasp, not even close enough to slip through my fingers. I don’t want to envy writers with fancy titles but I do sometimes and I wish I knew the secret to own one of those glorious titles because I have no idea how they became successful when I am still here, struggling and trying to remain positive among a sea of unknowns.

So in light of my own personal struggles with: juggling my caretaker responsibilities, my full-time day job that has lost its luster and passion for me, and my book business that most days seems to harbor on the back-burner anymore, I somehow lost sight of all the wonderful stuff and people I do have in my life and I was reminded about this fact, last night.

While staring up at the beautiful lights and ornaments of my Christmas tree, my special friend Michael reminded me to appreciate all that I have. He has been asking me to open my heart, which I did not know was in bad need of damage repair. Instead of love, anxiety and fear crept in. They have riddled my days, for quite a long while now, and I did not know. I didn’t realize, in this season of light and love, how far removed I was.

I am one that advises and encourage others any chance I can get. I help my fellow authors and author friends anytime I can and I work tirelessly to uplift others, even if it means spending hours messaging or talking with a friend so that they can feel better after our conversation. However, have I taken my own advice? Well… no. I encourage and cheer others but I haven’t done the same for myself. The problem is I expect so much out of life and out of myself and I want it Now. And because I haven’t received it and I see others successful when I am failing to achieve my goals, I have essentially forgotten to take care of myself.

I learned so many things yesterday but what I didn’t realize was that we can get caught up in our wants and desires and neglect ourselves in the process- and not even know it.

We need to take care of ourselves first because if we are not in the right frame of mind, we will accomplish nothing.

This is a reminder to look at your own lives and discover all that you have. I have seen several with no home when I have a comfortable one, begging for food when I am not lacking. I have an amazing dog and am fortunate enough to have found my life partner who is also my best friend. These are only a few of the many blessings that I, personally, have and I know you have a list too. During this upcoming New Year, write your list down and reflect upon it, knowing you are starting the New Year on a very good note. And may you receive many more blessing throughout 2018!

Christmas Memories

Hi Readers,

Do you have a favorite Christmas memory?

I posed this question to my Street Team earlier tonight.

I absolutely love Christmas and I shared with my group one of my favorite memories from when I was a kid but there are so many more like the time when my mom and I went Christmas Caroling through a volunteer group at our church.  It was wonderful.  There was nothing professional or organized about it.  Just a group of kind volunteers who wanted to spread Christmas cheer.  We followed each other, driving our individual cars to several homes and even to a local shelter to sing our hearts out.  Whether we were out of tune or not, no one cared and the smiles we received for our efforts lit up each home, each facility.

My best memory of that beautiful day was the last home we headed to.  It belonged to a man who was diagnosed with Lou Gehrig’s disease.  I remember entering his bedroom and seeing him lying in bed.  We waited as the nurse propped him up on his pillow and he watched us, all huddled in one corner of the room.  It was the first time I had ever met anyone with a debilitating disease and I was humbled by the experience.  After we sung several songs, so out of tune and uncoordinated the angels must’ve blushed, the nurse looked over at us in the silence and said he was smiling.  It almost brings tears to my eyes, once again, while I am writing this.  He has since passed but I truly hope we were able to bring a little bit of peace, a little bit of joy in his life amidst his final battle.

My mom and I tried to volunteer the following year and hoped for the same enjoyment but sadly, the church replaced the random acts of kindness from good people wanting to sing Christmas carols with the professional church choir and it was not the same.

However, I hold this memory of that special day and that precious man in my heart and that is the spirit of Christmas.  Of giving, of loving, and of spreading joy and comfort to those around us.

I truly hope you are surrounded by such love and joy and miracles, too, for each one of you deserves a lifetime of happiness.  This is what I wish for you.  Happy Holidays and Merry Christmas, my friends.  Be safe and enjoy the rest of the year.

My-favorite-Christmas-memory

It’s the little things..

surprise-happy-birthday-gifts-5Hi Readers,

Just some thoughts on my birthday to share.  You know, as the years pass by, it’s funny how our preferences change.  Just yesterday while my husband was running around trying to buy a gift for me, I realized how I would rather have his company instead of a gift.  Many, many years ago, in my twenties, I wouldn’t have agreed with this thinking and would’ve reached for the present instead but now with bills and responsibilities and duties, things like time are even more precious.  Objects can always be bought but company is hard to come by.

I still love receiving presents, though, but it’s the little things…  A special and unusual color of roses (dusty pink) in an arrangement from a man who means so much to me (when he has very little time to spare), whispered words in my ear of affection, generous hugs, pampering, festive communication in the middle of my day, and loving gestures mean the world to me, especially when coming from those I love.

So, as I sit here at my day job and am receiving a few birthday wishes, I am warmed by the recognition.  I’m also a bit sad with the realization that there hasn’t been any comments on my main FB page but it’s okay because it really doesn’t matter in the end and people have busy lives.  Yes, my birthday is special to me and I love celebrating it and the revelry behind it but… that all passes and then life continues.  So, in the meantime, on my special day, I will do little things to help celebrate who I am and where I’ve been.  And I am looking forward to those things that really matter to me and experiencing them with those I love.  That is the real celebration.

 

Coping in different ways

Tonight I learned that everyone grieves differently.  I probably already knew this but when faced with a short discussion with my dad I realized he and I deal with my mom’s death differently.

My husband and I have had lengthy conversations about what will happen if he passes away before me (hopefully this doesn’t happen).  He knows that I will be “getting rid of all his stuff” immediately, giving it away to charity or something.  I let him know this is not because I don’t love him or that I’m trying to get rid of him.  Oh no.  I love him so much.  But this is how I handle grief.

My mom passed away a little over two years ago though it seems like an eternity to me.  She understood me like no other ever has.  She was my best friend, my biggest fan and my strongest confidante.  She was my rock and I miss her dearly.   And how do I deal with her death?  By ignoring it.  Yup.  That is the only way I stay sane and that is the only way I can go on and survive living while she is up in heaven having fun without me.  I try not to think of her because thinking of her only brings tears and misery and I can’t go to work, on a daily basis, to help people if I am a mess myself.  So, this is my way to deal with the immense sadness of her loss in my life.  One day, hopefully, I will be able to think of her and not tear up but until then, this is the way I cope.  However; this is not the same for my dad~

My dad, who desperately needs to move into a first floor apartment because of his declining health, said to me today, that he can’t move into a smaller place because that would mean he would have to get rid of things and he can’t give up my mom’s stuff.  He said that and then he cried.  You see, my dad never cries because he doesn’t believe in a man crying.  While me, I feel differently.  I think if you have an emotion, let it out.  If you have to cry, do it.  It’s natural and it’s human and you can’t keep these things bottled up or they’ll just resurface again, and again.  He believes in prescriptions to pacify his inner turmoil while I believe prescriptions will only mask the inner pain- much like a band aid covering something temporarily.  In the end it peels off with time and the pain is still there.

But I understand where my dad is coming from and I told him this.  I am only trying to do what best for him but I get it.  In the end, it’s his decision the way he wants to live his life.  He chooses to live his life surrounded by objects my mom loved because it keeps her alive.  Storing these items away would only sadden him and the last thing I want to do is add more pain to his overflowing cup.

So, I guess the lesson is to love everyone while they are here.  Life is so short.  Appreciate those close to you for you never know what tomorrow might bring.  And, to try to understand when people do things differently than you would in the event of one’s passing.  Some create items to remind them of their loved ones, some need to have stuff owned by their loved ones around them while others, like me, can’t have the constant reminders surrounding them.  Everyone grieves differently but in the end, we are all trying to do the same thing:  survive this life to get to the other.

Ladies, you are Awesome!

You know what hurts? When I see women putting up with bad behavior.

 

Just today I saw a post from a friend who was engaged and happy but recently found out her boyfriend cheated on her.  This is very sad but, in my opinion, if he went outside of the relationship without your permission, he is not worth hanging onto.  You deserve better and he or she is out there for you, waiting.  Don’t go back to someone who can’t commit.  There’s too many of them out there and you deserve someone who respects you.

Sadly, too many women go back to broken men and failing relationships, maybe because we are comfortable in a situation we know or understand or maybe because we fear there’s nothing else for us and we’d rather settle for less than to be “alone”?  But the question remains…  Why do we allow people to treat us badly?

Ladies, let me tell you how beautiful you are. I don’t need to personally know you to let you know that you are Worthwhile and Gorgeous!

Don’t ever let any man or woman treat you as less than you are. Remember, it is your choice to remain in a relationship. We make choices every single day of our lives as to who we welcome into our personal circle and who remains within our inner circle.  If they are not treating you like a queen, should they stay?  Would you be better off without them, have less stress, or be able to live the life you want to live without their judgment?  In every circumstance, do what’s best for you because, in the end, you’re the only one that matters.  I know this might sound selfish but it’s not.  If everyone leaves, you should be able to rely on yourself and be happy with yourself.  If you’re not, change it.  You have to be whole before you can let anyone else in.

Remember this saying (that I absolutely love): You teach people how to treat you.

It’s so true and you deserve the best, always!

Have a wonderful day, my friends, and remember how beautiful you are!

#WritersLIfe    #Writing   #WroteToday

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