A Daydream of Paradise

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Sometimes, when we are striving to reach our goals, we forget how very much we have in our lives. We start taking them for granted, feeling we don’t have enough because we want so much more. As an author, we might even compare ourselves with others, colleagues who have hit the big leagues, have titles we covet like “best-selling author”, a book that is a best seller or a book that is in the top 100’s when ours are teetering in the millions.

I want so much more in life and even more with my book business but it seems the struggle continues. I try and try but success seems so far away and I wonder if I will ever obtain it. The more I try, the more success seems to be out of my grasp, not even close enough to slip through my fingers. I don’t want to envy writers with fancy titles but I do sometimes and I wish I knew the secret to own one of those glorious titles because I have no idea how they became successful when I am still here, struggling and trying to remain positive among a sea of unknowns.

So in light of my own personal struggles with: juggling my caretaker responsibilities, my full-time day job that has lost its luster and passion for me, and my book business that most days seems to harbor on the back-burner anymore, I somehow lost sight of all the wonderful stuff and people I do have in my life and I was reminded about this fact, last night.

While staring up at the beautiful lights and ornaments of my Christmas tree, my special friend Michael reminded me to appreciate all that I have. He has been asking me to open my heart, which I did not know was in bad need of damage repair. Instead of love, anxiety and fear crept in. They have riddled my days, for quite a long while now, and I did not know. I didn’t realize, in this season of light and love, how far removed I was.

I am one that advises and encourage others any chance I can get. I help my fellow authors and author friends anytime I can and I work tirelessly to uplift others, even if it means spending hours messaging or talking with a friend so that they can feel better after our conversation. However, have I taken my own advice? Well… no. I encourage and cheer others but I haven’t done the same for myself. The problem is I expect so much out of life and out of myself and I want it Now. And because I haven’t received it and I see others successful when I am failing to achieve my goals, I have essentially forgotten to take care of myself.

I learned so many things yesterday but what I didn’t realize was that we can get caught up in our wants and desires and neglect ourselves in the process- and not even know it.

We need to take care of ourselves first because if we are not in the right frame of mind, we will accomplish nothing.

This is a reminder to look at your own lives and discover all that you have. I have seen several with no home when I have a comfortable one, begging for food when I am not lacking. I have an amazing dog and am fortunate enough to have found my life partner who is also my best friend. These are only a few of the many blessings that I, personally, have and I know you have a list too. During this upcoming New Year, write your list down and reflect upon it, knowing you are starting the New Year on a very good note. And may you receive many more blessing throughout 2018!

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